Vogue

I went to the Dermatologist this week, for a few different reasons. Firstly, my friend Erin just had melanoma cut out of her arm and it scared me. Secondly, I have quite a few moles and they worry me sometimes. Thirdly, I had some money in my Flex Spending Account that had to be used by 06.30.10. I am healthy and so are the little places on my body.

I found the only Vogue magazine in the office and flipped through it in hopes that I would be called back by the nurse before I got to the end. Luckily, there was an interview with Michelle Williams that was really great and I jotted some of it down in my journal. I feel like she had significant things to say, instead of the usual silliness that comes from most celebrities.

"I remember being on my hands and knees. The ground was cold and muddy. I pushed back the dead leaves and saw the bright green shoots of spring. Under all this decay something was growing. Caring for the garden reminded me to care for myself.

"Geography is a great solution for heartbreak."


I feel like I am behind in life. I am not where I want to be.

My dogs have grounded me. Or so I was told. This I am told is my way of avoiding any other life commitments or is my excuse for the things that I am too scared to do.

Stress makes me bitter. Loneliness makes me unmotivated. And all those things make me feel sorry for myself.

I am on my own a lot. Sometimes I realize how not ok I am with that.